107 Funny Christmas Jokes and Puns 2023

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Christmas jokes and puns from 2023, although some older jokes might slip through

If these 107 Christmas jokes is not enough for you, please find lot more of Christmas jokes in our Christmas jokes collection

  1. What does the Gingerbread Man use to make his bed? Cookie sheets!
  2. What's Santa Claus's favourite track & field event? North Pole-vaulting!
  3. That sly smile on your face has me thinking youโ€™re up to snow good.
  4. I didn't think this party would be such a drag; I'm snow bored.
  5. What was Santa's best subject in school? Chemistree.
  6. What did the peanut butter say to the grape on Christmas? This is the season to be jelly.
  7. What's Santa Claus's favourite type of potato chip? Crisp Pringles!
  8. All I want for Christmas is ewe.
  9. I'm pine-ing for you.
  10. Have snow fearโ€”Christmas is here!
  11. Your presents are requested.
  12. Why did Santa put a clock in his sleigh? He wanted to see time fly!
  13. What do you call a reindeer ghost? A cari-boo!
  14. I bought my son a refrigerator for Xmas โ€“ I canโ€™t wait to see his face light up when he opens it.
  15. The moment you stop believing in Santa is when you start getting clothes for Christmas.
  16. This fire is so cozy, the snuggle is real.
  17. I'll be ho-ho-home for Xmas.
  18. A round of Santa-plause, please.
  19. Happy howlidays! Hope Santa Paws brings you lots of treats.
  20. Sending you pugs and kisses this Christmas.
  21. Who delivers Christmas presents to pets? Santa Paws.
  22. Yappy Holidays and a Happy New Year.
  23. Where does Santa stay when he goes on vacation? At a ho-ho-ho-tel.
  24. These decorations are tree-mendous.
  25. I only have ice for you.
  26. It is ice to meet you.
  27. Have your elf a merry little Christmas.
  28. How do dogs sing jingle bells? Dachshund through the snowโ€ฆ
  29. Merry Xmas. Hope itโ€™s not too ruff!
  30. How do Chihuahuas say merry Christmas? iFleas Navidog.
  31. What did the dog say to the Xmas tree? Bark.
  32. Santaโ€™s little yelper wants to wish you a Merry Christmas.
  33. Why was the dog upset about the Xmas tree? He was not even allowed to bring sticks into the house.
  34. Someoneโ€™s barking up the wrong Christmas tree.
  35. Paws a moment this Christmas to reflect on what the season is all about!
  36. What do you call a wet dog with a bell on his collar? Jingle smells!
  37. It is never chew late to wish you a Happy Holidays.
  38. If youโ€™re lucky this Xmas, Santa Claus will grace you with his presents.
  39. That look soots you.
  40. What do snowmen eat for breakfast? Snowflakes.
  41. Children who donโ€™t learn to tie their shoes properly are bound to wind up on the knotty list.
  42. It is the most wonderful time for a beer.
  43. The festive season has me feeling extra Santa-mental.
  44. How do dogs decorate for Xmas? They deck the paws with bows of collie.
  45. What do you do when itโ€™s raining cats and dogs? Nothing; as long as it does not reindeer.
  46. You sleigh me.
  47. Iโ€™ll never fir-get.
  48. In 2020, the best gift will be hand Santa-tizer.
  49. Youโ€™re the best person I snow.
  50. Itโ€™s the most wine-derful time of the year.
  51. I love when candy canes are in mint condition.
  52. Rebel without a Claus.
  53. Youโ€™re my soul Santa.
  54. What do snowmen eat for lunch? Ice burgers!
  55. What kind of music do elves listen to? Wrap.
  56. What do you call an old snowman? Water.
  57. Where do snowmen keep money? In a snow bank.
  58. What do you call Frosty the Snowman in May? A puddle!
  59. Which of Santa's reindeer has bad manners? Rude-alph!
  60. Why didn't the skeleton go to the Yule party? He had no-body to go with.
  61. What do you get if you combine Santa and a duck? A Xmas Quacker!
  62. What type of cars do elves drive? Toy-otas.
  63. When I think about you, I touch my elf.
  64. He is a fungi to be with.
  65. Eat, drink, and be tacky.
  66. I got my wife a wooden leg for Christmas. Itโ€™s a real stocking filler!
  67. Youโ€™ve got balls coming in here dressed like that.
  68. What is the worst Christmas present? A broken drum, you can't beat it.
  69. Did you hear about the mall Santa who lost his job? He was fired for Clause.
  70. What do you call people who are afraid of Santa clause? Claustrophobic.
  71. How does Santa keep track of all the fireplaces he has visited? He keeps a log book.
  72. Why is Santa banned from sooty chimneys? Carbon footprints.
  73. What do you call a cow that lives in an igloo? An eskimoo.
  74. Santa's beard is so long because he's bad at shaving. Why do you think they call him Saint Nick?
  75. What kind of linens do gingerbread men put on their beds? Cookie sheets.
  76. Single bells, single bells, single all the way.
  77. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite.
  78. Why are Christmas trees so bad at sewing? They keep dropping their needles.
  79. Who hides in the bakery at Xmas? A mince spy.
  80. How do the elves clean Santa's sleigh on the day after Christmas? They use Santa-tizer!
  81. What do snowmen have for breakfast? Snowflakes.
  82. Eat, drink, and be meowy.
  83. Have a meowy Christmas.
  84. Merry catmas! Hope you have a Purr-fect Holiday season!
  85. May your days be meowy and bright.
  86. All I want for Xmas is mew.
  87. Here comes Santa Claws, here comes Santa Clawsโ€ฆ
  88. Catty Canes.
  89. The tree and I are getting lit this Christmas.
  90. Are you oakay? Yes, I'm pine!
  91. I love hanging with you this season.
  92. Never fir-get how beautiful Christmas trees are.
  93. Have a tree-mendous Christmas.
  94. Hey DJ, drop the needles. Can I get a watt watt?
  95. I think my tree and I have a really good chemis-tree.
  96. Donโ€™t forget that everyone is rooting for you.
  97. This year my tree is #ballin.
  98. Ornamentary, my dear Watt-son.
  99. Hey tree, do not leaf me hanging.
  100. Looking at you is like reading poetree.
  101. Birch, please.
  102. I love the festive season more than you think.
  103. Yes, I do consider myself a Christmas tree hugger.
  104. Iโ€™m having fun fir sure.
  105. I love you a whole watt.
  106. What a de-light you are to be around.
  107. Advice from a tree: stand tall and proud, go out on a limb, remember your roots, and drink plenty of water.
 
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    โ™ฅ๏ธ๐Ÿ’ž4271 Sheppard Avenue east โฃ๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ’˜Wednesday, ๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’ž Sofia,๐Ÿ’“ tall and slim, experienced touch that will have you relaxed .๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’ฅ Mimi, ๐Ÿ’‹very small in stature. Pretty.. Nice touch for relaxation +. ๐Ÿ’• ๐Ÿ“ž 416 293-5071๐Ÿ“ž
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  27. Lulu1980:
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  29. EMSpa_schedule:
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  32. Spa in Markham:
  33. BlueXado Therapy & Spa:
  34. Pink Flower Spa:
  35. Jennyโ€™s Spa:
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  36. Annie Spa:
    ๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ANNIE SPA๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ โœ…7-1001 SANDHURST CIRCLEโœ… ๐Ÿ‘ŒSCARBOROUGH ON M1V 1Z6๐Ÿ‘Œ โ˜Ž๏ธ (647) 891-9688โ˜Ž๏ธ โ˜Ž๏ธ (416) 291-8879โ˜Ž๏ธ (FINCH & MCCOWAN) OPEN 9:30am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY ๐Ÿ”ฅโœ…NEW MANAGEMENT๐Ÿ’ฏNEW GIRLS๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ ๐Ÿ”ฅGORGEOUS NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS - TODAYโ€™s ROSTER INCLUDES: ๐Ÿ”ฅ Yumi๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ’‹A striking new tall gorgeous Korean model with long, flowing reddish-brown hair cascading down her back and a slender, elegant figure that exudes grace and poise. Yumiโ€™s natural confidence and allure, make her approa
  37. Lulu1980:
    Phoenix Blossom Spa ๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน2 girls ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ5124 Dundas St W Etobicokeโ˜Ž๏ธ416-817-3366๐Ÿ‘ New โ—๏ธ New girl Anna dainty and cute! Sexy body Hot body slide, super enjoyable๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜ very provocative service๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜, professional super Luna deep tissue massage, has therapeutic effect to loosen bones and relieve muscle pressure and will bring you unexpected service effects, she will bring you a little surprise๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜โค๏ธYou are welcome to make an appointment at any time or walk in the back door with plenty of p
  38. wonderspa:
    ๐ŸŒบWonder spa,(9421Jane st unit127)call416-5000-800โ˜Ž๏ธbest massage in vaughan,Tuesday RMT available,๐Ÿ’„sexy very young girl Mimi,natural c cup,very good looking amazing massage nice body slide,really popular ๐ŸŽlong hair Lucy Q smile,very good strong to relax oil ,back walk,more experience ๐Ÿ˜ปvery popular girl,more experience,must try๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ
  39. Golden Sunshine Spa:
    โœจClick on our Username and FOLLOW US for updates and special services ! โœ… Click Here Today๐ŸŒธAkame๐ŸŒธChristina๐ŸŒธXuka๐ŸŒธLynda๐ŸŒธIsabella Call us โ˜Ž 905 - 265 - 2158โ˜Ž๏ธ Your ultimate service awaits! โœจ
  40. ForeverWarden:
    Tuesday at ๐Ÿซฆโค๏ธ๐Ÿ”ด๐ŸŸฅโ™พ๏ธ๐“•๐“ž๐“ก๐“”๐“ฅ๐“”๐“ก ๐“ข๐“Ÿ๐“โ™พ๏ธ๐ŸŸฅ๐Ÿ”ดโค๏ธ๐Ÿซฆ2190 Warden Ave, Unit 201, Scarborough ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿฒ-๐Ÿด๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿฌ-๐Ÿณ๐Ÿด๐Ÿด๐Ÿณ: Cindy, Tracy & Vivian. Cindy is a slim beauty, 5โ€™4โ€, natural C Cups. Her massage is nice, her services will drive you wild & her finish is a dream come true. Tracy is an incredibly cute & pretty Japanese/Taiwanese mixed spinner, about 5โ€™1โ€ and 100 lbs. She is very popular for her exotic massage & services.
  41. AliceSpa:
    TUESDAY at ๐—”๐—Ÿ๐—œ๐—–๐—˜ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”, 4915 Steeles Ave. E, Scarborough ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿฒ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿต๐Ÿด-๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿด๐Ÿต๐Ÿด. 3 Young Beauties Today at Alice Spa. Open 10am to 9pm: ASHLEY (12pm-9pm) is a beautiful slim Korean student, snow white skin, 5'2, 100 Lbs, natural C Cup, pink nipples, baby face & voice, can accomodate bbbj cim cof rim dfk, excellent services. CLOUDIA (11:30am-9pm): is Vietnamese, young, petite 5'2" & 96 Lbs
  42. wilson holistic centre:
    new girl works at ๐Ÿ’‹535 Evans Ave today ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•โ˜Ž๏ธโ˜Ž๏ธ416-531-6969โ˜Ž๏ธโ˜Ž๏ธ
  43. HolidaySpa:
    Tuesday at ๐ŸŒด๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒ…๐“—๐“ธ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ญ๐“ช๐”‚ ๐“ข๐“น๐“ช๐ŸŒ…๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒด3517 Kennedy Rd, Unit 4, Scarborough โ˜Ž๏ธ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿญ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿต๐Ÿตโ˜Ž๏ธ: EMMA, JENNY & CINDY. EMMA is a very beautiful slim Chinese honey with C Cups, beauty face, & nice services to drive you wild. Jenny has a medium build, nicely curvy with a slim waist, pretty face, and very flexible skills. Jenny will make you very happy. CINDY is slim
  44. SugarLoveSpa:
    Tuesday at โค๏ธ๐Ÿ’™ ๐Ÿ’œโŽ๐—ฆ๐—จ๐—š๐—”๐—ฅ ๐—Ÿ๐—ข๐—ฉ๐—˜ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”โŽ ๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ’˜: CHRISTINA, MIMI, JENNY & TIFFANY. 1270 Finch Ave W (at Keele St), Unit 18. North York. CHRISTINA is Spanish, C Cups, 5'3", tall & nice curves, very open minded. MIMI is a slim & busty Asian/Euro mix beauty, 50Kgs & 1M60. Mimi has a very versatile range of services. JENNY is a sweet & young Korean girl with C Cups. Very versatile services.
  45. Soul Relax Spa:
    โœจ Looking for a relaxing escape? โœ… Click Here Meet๐ŸŒธNina๐ŸŒธAnna๐ŸŒธXukaCall us today for the best treatment and service experience. Click on our Username and FOLLOW US for updates ! Call now โ˜Ž 289 - 298 - 5662โ˜Ž๏ธ Your ultimate relaxation awaits! โœจ
  46. bnwellness_wilson:
    We have 4 young girls are working today, young pretty Mia 25โ€™s with curve body and young Taiwanese Victoria slime 25โ€™s open mind, young sexy Sophia with curve body 30โ€™s and cute GFE Lina are providing deep tissue massage, pls call 4163985777 book appointment and walk in always welcome,back entrance and parking available, 350 Wilson Ave North York
  47. Red Rose Spa:
    ๐ŸŒธ We have 11 hot brown girls today ๐ŸŒธ MONICA, ANGEL, SONIA, PRIYA, AMANDA, PAOLA, PREETI, KIRAN, ANGELINA, MONIKA, SALMA ๐ŸŒธ 2588 Birchmount ๐ŸŒธ 2 Invergordon ๐ŸŒธ 647-702-8800 ๐ŸŒธ Please visit for a great erotic massage
  48. luckywellness:
    Lucky Wellness Center 4379721888 295 Eglinton Ave E,Unit 7,Mississauga We have two girls working today. Kiki and Bella. They are both short, young, pretty, with lovely smiles and good massage.
  49. Lulu_Villa_Spa:
    Suki From Taiwan, sweet girl Cherry ๐Ÿ’ From Malaysia Part time School girl Sami Vietnamese Girl Natalie she is CBC/filipina mixed Petite girlโ€จโ˜Ž๏ธ647- 446-0886
  50. Lulu1980:
    Phoenix Blossom Spa ๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน2 girls ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ5124 Dundas St W Etobicokeโ˜Ž๏ธ416-817-3366๐Ÿ‘ New โ—๏ธ New girl Anna dainty and cute! Sexy body Hot body slide, super enjoyable๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜ very provocative service๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜, professional super Luna deep tissue massage, has therapeutic effect to loosen bones and relieve muscle pressure and will bring you unexpected service effects, she will bring you a little surprise๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜โค๏ธYou are welcome to make an appointment at any time or walk in the back door with plenty of p
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